So there's this problem, see, with all these illegal immigrants sneaking over the southern border and screwing stuff up. Or something. And we gotta fix that, right? So I propose a simple solution. Eliminate the border. We take over Mexico and make it the 51st state. Send the tanks tomorrow! Sure, we'd probably have to rename it "Old Mexico" since we have a state called New Mexico, but that's not a problem - that's what they called it in those Young Gun movies, I think, so there's a precedent. Once Old Mexico is a state, everyone there is already an American citizen so they can move to Texas if they want to - no big deal. Of course, this new state needs a lot of work, so we'd have to start fixing things down there. We don't want our Old Mexicans to be second class citizens.
And really, that's where I'm going with this. Congress and the president are attacking the the symptons of this immigration problem, not the root cause. The root cause is that Mexico is apparently a really sucky place to live. At least, that's my assumption since so many Mexicans risk their lives to come here. If I were a Mexican I would be ashamed of my country. And I'd try to do something to fix it. But since it's not just their problem, it's ours what with all the illegal immigration, it would make sense for our government to help Mexico's economy. Make it a better place to live and then we won't have so much illegal immigration.
Or we could just send the tanks.